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Audie1 · 01-27-2008, 07:57 AM

Subject: The Marine

Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, Cokie Roberts (All News People), and a tough old U.S.Marine

A Marine Sergeant and 3 News Reporters were all captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded .

Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan; so I'd like one last bowlful
of hot spicy chili." The leader nodded to an underling who left and
returned with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die content."

Peter Jennings said, "I am Canadian, so I'd like to hear the song "O
Canada" one last time." The leader nodded to a terrorist who had studied
the Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag
Musicians and played the anthem. Jennings sighed and declared he could
now die peacefully.

Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my
tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen.
Maybe someday some one will hear it and know that I was on the job
till the end." The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and
Roberts dictated some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy."

The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr.. U.S. Marine, what is
your final wish?"
"Kick me in the ass," said the Marine.
"What?" asked the leader? "Will you mock us in your last hour?"
"No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass," insisted
the Marine. So the leader shoved him into the open, and kicked him in the
ass. The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm
pistol from inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead. In the
resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4
carbine and sprayed the Iraqis with gunfire. In a flash, all the Iraqis were
either dead or fleeing for their lives.

As the Marine was untying Rather, Jennings, and Roberts, they asked
him, "Why didn' t you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you
ask them to kick you in the ass first?"

"What," replied the Marine???, "and have you three Assholes report
that I was the aggressor?"

01-27-2008, 07:57 AM	#1
Audie1 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Summerville, SC Posts: 931	The Marine Subject: The Marine Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, Cokie Roberts (All News People), and a tough old U.S.Marine A Marine Sergeant and 3 News Reporters were all captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded . Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan; so I'd like one last bowlful of hot spicy chili." The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die content." Peter Jennings said, "I am Canadian, so I'd like to hear the song "O Canada" one last time." The leader nodded to a terrorist who had studied the Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag Musicians and played the anthem. Jennings sighed and declared he could now die peacefully. Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe someday some one will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end." The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Roberts dictated some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy." The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr.. U.S. Marine, what is your final wish?" "Kick me in the ass," said the Marine. "What?" asked the leader? "Will you mock us in your last hour?" "No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass," insisted the Marine. So the leader shoved him into the open, and kicked him in the ass. The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead. In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4 carbine and sprayed the Iraqis with gunfire. In a flash, all the Iraqis were either dead or fleeing for their lives. As the Marine was untying Rather, Jennings, and Roberts, they asked him, "Why didn' t you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you ask them to kick you in the ass first?" "What," replied the Marine???, "and have you three Assholes report that I was the aggressor?" __________________ 1987 Buick Grand National